I Never Intended To Be A Sidechick. 3
The reality of being a side chick, now struck me. I couldn’t believe it was happening to me and this led to depression. My baby boy was born prematurely, in the eighth month. But unfortunately, he died two weeks later. Despite the turn of events, all I wanted was Steve by my side, I felt I was part of him.
Three months after I lost the baby, My parents sat me down and advised that I go back to school. They told me to forget about Steve as it was evident he was happily married and would never leave his wife for me! Deep down my heart, I knew they were right. If he was going to leave Kathy for me, he would have already done that. But I was in denial and continued living in dream land! I told dad, I needed some more time to heal and rethink through everything.
In the evenings, I called Steve and told him we needed to talk.
An hour later he came. I told him that I loved him and wanted to get married to him even as a second wife. Steve point blank, told me he wasn’t a polygamist and he couldn’t deal with the dramas that comes along with it.” Agatha I am so sorry, you are still young and beautiful, another man will come to you. Go back to school and finish your education, you are really brilliant don’t waste this chance”. Said Steve.
Despite Steve giving me a cold shoulder, I kept calling and sending him messages. Charity thought I was stooping so low and that the world didn’t only revolve around Steve.” Love is strong. It is really hard to fall out, when you love someone wholeheartedly”. Was my response!
However, Steve brutally put an end to our relationship. He sent a message stating that we were done and he didn’t want anything to do with me ever again! From that day forward, I never ever contacted him and vice versa. He was back in employment and things seemed well for him.
When I finally went back to school, I had a tough time making new friends. Charity had completed by then. I Kept to myself and vowed, never to be in a relationship while at school, especially with a married man. I heed my parents advice and I managed to graduate with very good grades.
Fast-forward, two years later I met John and we got married. After I had my baby, I asked my cousin Leah, to come and live with us. Little did I know I was inviting problems in my home. She and John started having an affair which resulted in pregnancy. I was devastated, I even remembered Kathy’s words” that I was also a woman and one day I would go through worse situations than hers.”. And indeed it came to pass! Those three first years in my marriage were hectic. But, I didn’t leave my husband. Divorce was not on my agenda, I wasn’t ready to be alone or start all over again, hence I vowed to stick by him. When Leah gave birth, the baby turned out to be for her boyfriend. She was at that time dating a cheap white boy from South Africa. Had the baby not been mixed, I wouldn’t really have been convinced that it wasn’t my husband’s !
Actually, she was already three months pregnant when she started sleeping with John. Somehow it was a relief to me as nothing was going to tie them together. After Leah left, my husband’s infidelity even became worse. He changed women like underwear. I even remembered the way I gave Kathy a hard time until God fought the battle for her. My heart was heavy. At church the following Sunday, I had to talk to the pastor’s wife about the problems I was going through in my marriage. I told her about my past life too.
With the help of the pastor and his wife, arrangements to go and talk to Kathy were made. Luckily, she honoured our visit. When we entered her house, I knelt before her just like she did years back. In tears, I asked for her forgiveness and to bury the past by not holding any grudges against me. I told her, I could not succeed tearing them apart and I was sorry for the heartaches I caused her. I knew how it felt to be married to a man, who not only slept with anybody but also with my relatives!